By What Authority…

…do I call myself shaman…10408778_10153316388817119_3406768768786012428_n

By the spirits who entered me and tormented me 24/7 for eight long years while the new age sat on their ass, mocked me, called themselves “The Great I AM” and had the audacity to question me.

I control those spirits now.  They have learned respect and that is the authority by which I speak.



No Privacy…


I’ve mentioned the fact that there is no privacy.  I’m not talking about Facebook that is regularly hacked or emails that can easily be intercepted.  I’m talking about real privacy of one’s own person.

We are being watched…always.  Spirit?  Other dimensions?  Could be grandmother thinking you’ve become quite the little shit.  Could be another form of life we will soon be introduced to.  Don’t know who or what “they” are or what they want.

So the next time you are in the shower imagining that no one sees remember this is what drives the shaman mad.  They are watching, are entering our minds and the madness comes from the shaman’s ability to hear and see them as well.  The shaman is the person who can walk with this knowledge and not jump off a cliff.  You try living with that knowledge and see where it takes you.

We are not alone.

An Ugly Creature…

Several years ago I had a couple of online “friends” who were pushing their new age and Jungian ideals on me.  Nothing I did was right. They took on the role of “teacher” and pushed me into the role of student though I didn’t belong there.

At that time, I found out that my niece had been raped and she was threatened to keep quiet about it.  It took time but she finally managed to speak out about it.  I was devastated.  How dare someone violate a child in such a way.  I confided in my online “friends” and to my surprise they began giving me lessons in shadow work.

Not once did they ask how my niece was.  Not once did they express sorrow or concern for her well being.

In a matter of a very short time, they all became ugly to me…the ugliest creatures on earth.

My heart turned black and cold and when I would not submit to the role of “student” to their foul teachings, they abandoned me.

They left a scar…a large one.  And it is something I’ve had to work through.

This is a record of my journey and I have every right to use this space to work through this.  If someone has a problem with that too bad.  Maybe it means you are as ugly a creature as they are.

Ace of Swords…

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The Ace of Swords shows the beginning of a situation whose potential is as double-edged as the blade of the sword itself. The Ace implies the use of great power, even excessive power at times, to further one’s ends but what is not clear is how those powers will be used, or what it is that you are trying to achieve. No matter what the goal, there is always great power behind the attempts to reach it and, as such, very little can stand in the way of the energy of the Ace of Swords without being destroyed.

The power of the Ace of Swords can be drawn up by anyone whose heart, mind and will are strong. However, it is up to the bearer of the Sword to tap that potential and use it in a way that is beneficial for the greater good.

The Ace of Swords represents a period of great insight and mental clarity. It signifies a ‘break-through’ or an ‘aha’ moment where suddenly conscious understanding and mental reasoning reach their peak, and achievement of goals suddenly becomes a lot easier. You have a new understanding of some issue that has been of concern, or, in a broader sense, a new world view. This is a perfect time to clear away the fog that has kept you from seeing the inner truth, so that you can now cut to the heart of the matter. This is also a good time to act, and if you set your mind to accomplishing your goals, you can achieve anything you desire.

The Ace of Swords highlights a new idea, inspiration, original thinking and creative vision. It represents a point at which you have a new way of thinking and the energy to go with it. You are excited to pursue new opportunities that draw upon your creative and mental abilities.

The Ace of Swords also encourages you to seek out the truth of the matter and to find justice. You may be championing a cause or standing up for your rights or the rights of others. Thus sometimes, the Ace of Swords can suggest that you are prepared for ‘battle’. You have great clarity on a situation and can now argue your case with the view to come out victorious. You may have a new idea for which you are ready to fight, or you may be all fired up on an issue that you are particularly passionate about, such as human rights, the environment or your personal beliefs. This card invites you to use mental force and to use your intellect and critical reasoning. If faced with a challenging situation, you need to be ready for ‘battle’ and be prepared to find the strength to overcome these challenges.  Read More…